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| I found some old entries from a separate journal site. This does not in any way reflect my feelings now, just found it interesting and wanted to share. It is interesting how you go through so many phases in life and then you look back on them only to think, "Wow I can't believe I really felt that way!"
March 26, 2006
Do you ever find yourself longing for childhood again? Went to Hobby Lobby today and it really made me wish for those days when (for me, anyway) life was innocent and happy-go-lucky. I want to go home. I want to not feel stupid. I want to feel appreciated. I don't have much but what I do have I give without question.
So here it is: I am neither profound nor deep. Sometimes, or maybe all the time, I simply exist and state the obvious. It's not something I really do on purpose - as if to say, "hey look at me I see what's right in front of me." Sometimes it's just because I want to say something or that I find something interesting.
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| Welcome to the end of era
I await my defense this week with excitement and apprehension
I just want to be d o n e ! | | |
| The cloud-capped towers, the gorgeous palaces,
The solemn temples, the great globe itself,
Yea, all which it inherit, shall dissolve;
And leave not a rack behind.
We are such stuff as dreams are made on,
And our little life is rounded with a sleep. | | |
| I spend the greater portion of my life these days in bed. Not sleeping, mind you, but TRYING to sleep. I lay there thinking of sunny days on cruises and being a carefree child again. Then the storm clouds roll into my reverie and I’m left with the cold shudder of reality: that sick and sinking feeling in my stomach, heart, and head. The room spins and I open my eyes. What felt like at least a couple of hours was actually only a couple of minutes. I close my eyes only for it to happen all over again. Please let me sleep.
“Maybe I'm just living out the same old stories in and out
But you know that don't make it easier
Time will fly away with me if truth won't stop and let me see…
I’m drowning”
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| I am back in MS after 10 days in eastern Europe. We went to Munich, Salzburg, Melk, Vienna, and Prague. As sad as it seems, I am quite happy to be back in Hattiesburg. Had a great time, drank a lot of good beer, saw incredible sights, and sang some decent concerts. Got to make my "European accompanying debut" (ha) as well as conduct the men in the Salzburg Cathedral.
I had a lot of time to think on this trip. It definitely made me glad that I live in the United States and also made me realize how very lucky I am to be surrounded by the people that are in my life. I lit a candle for you at St. Stephen's Cathedral in Vienna.
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